Read Em(ails) and Weep
"I wish I could spend more time reading and writing emails," said no one ever.
Hack Recap: In the last Hack, I discussed ambiguous pronouns, fake transitions, and waffles covered with paint.
This week’s Hack: To make your emails clearer and more concise, try this three-part structure.
Earlier this week, I received an email that tantalizingly promised information about how to renew my parking permit before I start commuting again. But I ran into a problem: No matter how many times I read the email, I couldn’t figure out how to renew my parking permit. I wrote to the parking office to ask for more information, and they promptly responded with the information I needed. But those twenty minutes are gone forever.
If you’ve ever had a similar experience (and I know you have!), I’m here to tell you that life doesn’t have to be this way. Emails can be clearer—and they can be shorter.
To write an effective email, you should, of course, use the same strategies you would use for any other piece of writing. You should think about what your readers do and do not need to hear. And you should avoid repetition and unnecessary words. But if I could only offer one piece of advice about writing emails, it would be this: Use paragraphs.
When you write an email that’s all one big block of text, you don’t give your reader any guidance about what your main point is—or how your ideas fit together.
Here’s an example of an email that requires the reader to do too much work:
Dear Zeus:
Thanks for taking the time today to review the draft in detail and discuss your questions, proposed edits, and changes. I’m attaching the revised rental agreement, showing the additional changes I made today in response to the issues we discussed on the call. Let me know if you need assistance with preparing the final document. I also attached a clean version, which you can use if you find the changes acceptable. You can send along the document to the renters, and reach out to me if they have any questions or edits that would change the terms of the agreement.
This isn’t the worst email I’ve ever read. The key information is all there: We know that the rental agreement has been revised. We know that if Zeus finds it acceptable, he can go ahead and send it to the renters.
But Zeus had to read this email more than once to keep track of the details.
What would make this email easier to read? PARAGRAPHS.
Okay, you might say. But you can’t just take a chunk of text and randomly cut that into smaller chunks of text. So how should you decide what goes in each paragraph? Here’s where my three-part structure comes in, complete with handy acronym: CAP (CONNECTION, ACTION, PLAN).
To CAP your emails, you should divide your text into three sections. For short emails, each section will be a brief (sometimes even one-sentence) paragraph. For longer emails, you may need to write a few paragraphs for that middle section (ACTION), which is where you will express the main point of your email. Think of the CAP structure as a guideline rather than as a rigid template. If you start with one paragraph for each section, you can always add more paragraphs for more detailed emails.
Let’s take a look at each section:
Section 1: C is for CONNECTION
You’ve probably received at least one email already this week that begins “I hope you had a great weekend!” And during this long pandemic year, we’ve all received many emails that start with “I hope this email finds you well.” Should you start your emails with those specific sentences? That’s a topic for another Hack1. But wherever you stand on finding people well, it’s helpful to establish some kind of a connection with your reader at the beginning of an email.
If you’re writing to someone you don’t know, your connection should offer some context for why you are writing to them.
Dear Ms. Rosenzweig:
I recently watched your TED Talk on creating catchy acronyms for writing strategies, and I was very impressed.
If you do know the person, you may want to make a connection between your past interactions and your current reason for writing. And if you want to avoid invoking the weekend, you can always start with something more straightforward:
Dear Tasha:
I’m writing to follow up on our discussion at today’s meeting.
Section 2. A is for ACTION
Once you’ve made an initial (brief) connection, it’s time to get to your main point. Why are you writing to this person? What do you want? What action are you taking or proposing?
Example
Dear Tasha:
[CONNECTION] I’m writing to follow up on our discussion at today’s meeting.
[ACTION] While I very much appreciated hearing both of your ideas for new breakfast cereals, I don’t think we can afford to pursue a new product line at this time. I am sorry to have to pass on the idea for marshmallow gummy-worm shredded wheat, which I am sure would be very appealing to many consumers in our target market.
In this email, my action is the rejection of this new and exciting cereal. What you put in the action section of an email will vary depending on your goals. You may be seeking help from IT. You may be proposing a policy change. You may be checking in with a manager. If you are presenting a complex proposal or request, you may need more than one paragraph to develop your ideas.
SECTION 3. P is for PLAN
When you’re done outlining your main request or action, it’s time to leave your readers with next steps. Do you have a plan? Are you making a promise?
Let’s look at the same example one more time:
Dear Tasha:
[CONNECTION] I’m writing to follow up on our discussion at today’s meeting.
[ACTION] While I very much appreciated hearing both of your ideas for new breakfast cereals, I don’t think we can afford to pursue a new product line at this time. I am sorry to have to pass on the idea for marshmallow gummy-worm shredded wheat, which I am sure would be very appealing to many consumers in our target market.
[PLAN] Although we won’t be able to move forward with “Breakfast Worms,” I would like to keep in touch and hear other proposals from you in the future.
Now that I’ve laid out the CAP method, let’s go back and CAP the email to Zeus.
Dear Zeus:
[C]Thanks for taking the time today to review the draft in detail and discuss your questions, proposed edits, and changes.
[A] I’m attaching the revised rental agreement, showing the additional changes I made today in response to the issues we discussed on the call. I also attached a clean version, which you can use if you find the changes acceptable.
[P]: Please reach out to me if the renters have any questions or edits that would change the terms of the agreement, and let me know if you need any assistance preparing the final document.
The text is similar, but the paragraphs help the reader to focus on what has been done and what still needs to be done.
You can also use the CAP structure to outline your emails.
In the Zeus example, I took an email that was drafted as one paragraph and divided it into three paragraphs. But you can also use CAP as a template to organize your thinking before you start writing. If you find yourself staring at a blank screen, try typing the CAP section headings. Then, try to fill in the details. Here’s an example of a CAP outline for an email about employee benefits:
CONNECTION: I want to follow up on the question about employee benefits that you asked at today’s meeting.
ACTION: If we are seriously considering changing the gym benefit, we will need to propose alternatives by May 29 in order to include them in next year’s open enrollment period.
PLAN: Please let me know if you would like to move forward with this project.
Not every email will fit the template perfectly. But if you start with CAP in mind, you’ll be less likely to include information you don’t need. Your email will be easier to write—and easier to read.
Hack challenge: Try the CAP method with at least one email this week—and let me know how it goes!
I’d love to hear your thoughts on the question of emails that refer to your great weekend. Please share in the comments!
Loved it!!
I completely ignore those questions about how I am doing or how my weekend was or how I am surviving the pandemic, unless the person offers something personal or revelatory to me.